


Mutually Satisfying Weirdness

by Tabithian



Series: A Lighted Window [12]
Category: Batman (Comics), DCU, DCU (Comics), Red Hood and the Outlaws (Comics)
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-16
Updated: 2016-02-16
Packaged: 2018-05-21 01:10:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6032644
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tabithian/pseuds/Tabithian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jason and Dick have been together for. Christ, it feels like forever, really, so Jason's gotten used to Dick pulling weird shit on him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mutually Satisfying Weirdness

**Author's Note:**

> Based on [this post](http://tabithian.tumblr.com/post/139338183929/alrightevans-i-just-saw-a-thing-on-fb) and one other I saw on Tumblr that I can't find again, because I'm a champ like that. /o\

Jason and Dick have been together for. Christ, it feels like forever, really, so Jason's gotten used to Dick pulling weird shit on him.

“Jason. Hey. Hey, Jay. _Jay_.” 

Thing is, though.

Half the time Dick pulls weird shit on him in the middle of the night when Jason's low on sleep and patience and high on annoyance and irritation.

“Dick.”

Dick doesn't pay attention to the warning signs, the way Jason's voice drops to this near-growl because it's the middle of the night and he has to be up early. Roy's out because Lian's sick, and Kory's got some kind of appointment that means she won't be in until the afternoon.

Murder Kitten has been after Jason like he's done playing around and fully intends to kill him this time, and the rest of their brood seems to think it's high entertainment.

And Dick.

Dick is looking at Jason, face way too damn close to Jason's right now as he keeps poking Jason's cheek, trying to get him to answer.

“Jason. C'mon, Jay. I have an important question.”

Jason groans, reaching up to plant a hand on Dick's face and pushes him away to a point he doesn't get bombarded by morning – night? - breath.

“The hell, Dick?”

Somewhere on Dick's side of the bed Tim lets out this low whine, bed moving as he hops off to find somewhere quiet to sleep. 

Dick wraps his fingers around Jason's wrist and tugs his hand down, scooting back closer than ever, this _look_ on his face that has Jason fully awake.

Fully awake and wary, because _Dick_.

“Do you like me?”

Jason.

“Jason?”

The hell.

“What.”

Dick huffs, one of his thumbs resting over the pulse point in Jason's wrist.

“Do you like me?”

Jason closes his eyes and sighs, wonders what the hell his life is, because really.

“Dick.”

“Jay.”

Christ.

Jason opens his eyes, sees Dick's face way too up close and personal and says, against his better judgment, “Yeah, you fucker, I like you.”

Just not all that much at the moment, because reasons.

And Jason would like to think that's the end of it, but no.

No.

This is Dick, after all.

“Okay, but,” Dick says, frowning. “But do you like me, or _like-like_ me?”

Jason stares at Dick as this slow smile starts its way across his face, all smug and assholish and holy Christ, it's too damn early for this bullshit.

Jason pulls his wrist free and yanks Dick's pillow out from under his head, ignoring his startled yelp.

“You're such an asshole, Dick, I swear to God,” Jason snarls, smacking Dick with the pillow and trying not to let the fucker's laughter get to him, make him smile because _no_. 

********

Jason's at the grocery store, picking a few things up on his way home when he gets a text from Dick.

He's tired, distracted, which is why it takes a moment to realize the chorus from one of the insidious pop songs that's everywhere is coming from his pocket.

“Oh, for - “

Jason pulls his phone out and glares at it before entering in his password. Tries to ignore the way the soccer mom with her cart of organic everything at the end of the aisle is giving him this incredibly judgmental look.

 _What did I say about changing my fucking ringtone?_ Jason sends, before reading Dick's text. 

There's a pause, Jason edging more to the side when some little old lady clears her throat meaningfully behind him, bottles of wine in her carts rattling as she pushes past him.

Jason gets a _:D_ back from Dick, and _So, do you want to?_

And.

Jason scrolls up, sees Dick original text message and stares for a long, long moment.

Because.

_Hey, you want to be fake engaged for a couple of hours to try wedding cake samples?_

Jason looks around, sees the soccer mom still watching him, that little old lady studying the vodka selection, and sighs. Takes a moment to change his ringtone to the default, even though he knows Dick's going to get in and change it later. (It's an ongoing battle with him.)

_I can buy you a cake right now, I'm at the goddamned store._

There's an entire bakery here, even. 

_Yeah, but. Free cake._ Dick sends, and, _Don't you want free cake? :(_

What Jason wants is for his life to make even a little bit of sense. Not all the time, he's not that greedy, just. 

Special occasions or something.

Apparently Jason isn't answering fast enough, because Dick sends him _:((((((((((((((((((((((((_ next, and even the soft chime of Jason's phone sounds sad, which.

Who even knows, really.

 _I'm not dressing up,_ Jason texts, because it's not like he's in control of his life anymore when it comes to things like this. 

********

Dick manages to charm a few of the cake vendors and bakeries into giving them sample to take home with them.

Jason would say he doesn't know how, but he's got years of Dick talking him into or around to things under his belt. He knows it's a combination of the fucker's natural charisma, good looks, and being the kind of asshole who will take ruthless advantage of both if necessary.

“So,” Dick says, licking icing off the side of his hand as he shoves the lasts of the samples in the fridge. “About this.”

Jason leans against the counter, reaching up to give Cass a little scratch behind her ears as she butts up against his shoulder. Ignores the beady pairs of eyes glaring down at him from where Murder Kitten's perched, but he does move to put Dick a little more between them. (Murder Kitten probably won't go through him to get to Jason.)

“Yeah,” Jason says, watching as Dick crouches down to bury his hands in Tim's ruff, cooing nonsense to him and avoiding eye contact. “About this.”

Because Dick.

Weird doesn't even begin to describe it.

Dick bumps his head against Tim's, and mutters something under his breath before pulling something out of his jacket pocket.

Jason stands up a little straighter, weird nervous fluttering in his stomach.

“I uh.”

Dick laughs, pulling Tim into a hug that has the poor mutt whining in confusion and worry, and Jason's feeling some of that himself, to be honest.

“Dick.”

Dick looks up at Jason, this stupid, helpless smile on his face as he throws whatever he's holding at Jason's face.

“Fucker,” Jason says, catching it before it hits him. “What - “

And then Jason realizes what he's holding.

Small box covered in velvet.

Dick's looking at him, this crooked little smile on his face.

“I kind of figured today was a test run for the real thing, you know?” Dick says. “The cake's the most important part, you know.”

Christ.

Jason opens the box he's holding, scowling at the way hand shakes because _no_ , and.

It's.

“Did you get this out of a fucking machine?”

The ring is some cheap little plastic thing, silver paint chipped, and the fake gemstone is loose. A closer look at the box it's in and Jason sees the logo to the retro arcade by Dick's precinct.

“Hey,” Dick says, getting to his feet, this look on his face Jason doesn't know what to do with. “It was kind of a spur of the moment thing. And don't knock it, you have no idea how many quarters I went through to get it.”

Jason stares at him.

This idiot who pushed his way into Jason's life and proceeded to turn it upside down, made Jason _domestic_. Brought kids into the equation when he brought Tim home, let Steph and Murder Kitten and the others into their lives.

This idiot, who does the stupidest shit like waking Jason up in the middle of the night for the most ridiculous questions, who gets Jason to do the stupidest shit.

This fucking idiot who is looking at Jason like he doesn't know how much he's given Jason over the years, how he's made him a better person.

“Bruce and Alfred are really going to murder me, aren't they?” Jason asks, taking the ring out out of the box and holding it up 

Cheap, flimsy, and about a million sizes too small to fit any of Jason's fingers.

He watches Dick moving closer in his periphery, Tim at his side.

“Is that a yes?”

Dick's smiling at him, head tilted to the side.

Jason lowers his hand, gives Dick this look.

“Dibs on Roy as best man,” Jason says, because seriously, how is that even a question? “And you get to tell the Murder-in-laws.”

Dick opens his mouth, probably to defend Bruce and Alfred, but - 

“And it's a yes, you jackass.”


End file.
